Spirit Bound Thinking
by darcyalex
Summary: SPIRIT BOUND SPOILERS! Just two random scenes from Spirit Bound that I thought would go differently. The first one is how I thought the 'staking/healing' scene SHOULD have gone. And what I was picturing would happen when Rose saw Dimitri in jail.
1. Staking Dimitri

**You may have noticed I have previously published these two short stories, but I decided to do it again and make these two the only ones, the Frostbite thing is now it's own one-shot.**

**This one is how I think it should have gone down when Lissa staked Dimitri. Don't get me wrong, I love the way Richelle Mead writes and there isn't anything **_**wrong**_** with her way of writing (I mean, it's the original after all! And no fanfic beats that) I just wish it would have gone this way...**

**Disclaimer- Thank the universe for Richelle Mead, she owns VA, not me.**

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**-Staking Dimitri-**

I'll never be able to say how long the next series of events took. In some ways, it felt like only one heartbeat passed. At the same moment, it was like we were frozen in time. Like the entire world had stopped.

My stake was moving toward him, and as Dimitri's eyes fell on me once more, I think he finally believed I would kill him. I was not hesitating. This was happening. My stake was there—

And then it wasn't.

Something hit me hard on my right side, pushing me away from Dimitri and ruining my shot. I stumbled, barely avoiding hitting anyone. While I always tried to be vigilant regarding all the things around me in a fight, I'd let my guard down in that direction. The Strigoi and guardians were on my left. The wall—and Lissa and Christian—were in my right.

And it was Lissa and Christian who had shoved me out of the way.

I think Dimitri was as astonished as I was. He was also equally astonished when Lissa came toward him with that stake in her hand. And like lightning through the bond, I read what Lissa had very, very carefully kept from me the last day: She gad managed to charm the stake with Spirit. It was the reason she'd been so keyed up during her last stake-practice session.

As her hand came close, Dimitri went to swipe her away, and I moved quickly to stop them both, but a ring of fire came around Dimitri. I moved away and so did Lissa, Dimitri just looked surprised. Christian was keeping control of the perfect circle of fire, closing in on Dimitri.

Lissa moved in again, but I reached out and put my hand under hers on the stake, stopping her movements.

"I have to, Rose," she pleaded.

"Then we do it together."

She put her other hand on top of the stake and I put my other one on top of hers. We moved in on a still distracted Dimitri, and with my, much stronger hands holding onto Lissa's, we staked him.

Everything lit up, a super bright light and I lost my connection with Lissa, I was unable to feel her and that scared me. If not for my hands, strongly clasped onto hers, I would have thought she vanished. The light became so bright everyone in the room stopped, needing to look away.

Lissa lost her firm grip on the stake, and I lost mine too. We both flew to different corners of the tiny room. I hurt, but I knew it wouldn't last.

I landed face down on the floor with a thud. I looked up to see Dimitri on the floor too, right where he had been standing as a Strigoi. I crawled over to him, weak from the power Spirit had let out so close to me.

As I got closer, I reached out for him.

He slowly opened his eyes. They were a perfect brown, no taint of red around the rim.

"Roza," he whispered, so confused. My heart clenched.

"Dimitri," I tried to say, but my voice was so croaky. The tips of my fingers reached his cheek, his smooth, perfect cheek. It made me so warm inside, all the Spirit wielding through me had confused my mind, my sense of hot and cold, but that small touch made me see sense.

I didn't know where Lissa was, the bond was broken, and while I hoped not permanently, I couldn't worry about that for the moment.

"I'm so sorry, Roza," Dimitri said, his voice trembling from the tears building up in his eyes. I'd never seen him cry before. "I love you..." he whispered, just before I felt unconsciousness creep over my mind. The last thing I heard was Lissa yelling at some guardians to leave him alone, but his words were the ones burned into my mind as everything went dark.

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**What do you think? These are just my brainstorms in words really, so you can tell me they're crap if you think they are. Anyway, reviews much appreciated.**

**So I hope you liked it :)**

**WIWR xx**


	2. Seeing Dimitri

**So this one has nothing to do with Staking Dimitri, that is, for this one, Staking Dimitri never happened, the staking/healing scene happened like it did in Spirit Bound.**

**So while I was reading Sprit Bound and I was reading about how Dimitri didn't want to see Rose, I started to create my own scenario in my head of what would happen if she did get to see him... Obviously I continued reading and my idea was completely different, but I thought I would write this out and post it up. Review and tell me what you think. **

**I also don't own VA or any of it's characters... so thank the universe for Richelle Mead! Do it!  
**

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How could he do this to me?

I loved him, he knew that. This isn't fair. _I'm_ the one who risked everything I had to go to Siberia. _I'm _the one who planned everything to save him, who busted my mortal enemy out of a high security prison to find Robert Doru, so he could tell us how to save him. _I _wasthe mastermind, the hero. Lissa was the sidekick; all she did was stake him and use her powers. None of which would have happened if not for _me_.

And he treated _her_ like the goddess. Once upon a time that was me, I was his goddess. And now he didn't want me.

Well, so helped me God, I was _going_ to see him and I was going to _make _him acknowledge me and see me.

I walked over to the building where he was being held, and as I got closer, I saw Lissa walking away, coming towards me. What was she doing there _again?_

Now I was pissed off.

I ducked out of sight and let Lissa pass. Then I continued to the building. As soon as I walked in, the guard on duty tried to tell me I wasn't supposed to be there, but I continued towards the door that led to Dimitri. He leapt out from behind the counter and stepped in front of me, blocking the door.

He tried to protest again but I swung out and moved to pin him against the wall by the throat.

I pushed a little to make sure he was uncomfortable. He clenched his teeth tightly, letting me now it was a good position.

"You _cannot _go down there," he said through his still gritted teeth.

"Really?" I asked. "That's funny, because I'm pretty sure you're going to ring those guards down there and tell them Dimitri has a visitor, and you're _not_ going to mention that it's me. Got it?"

He stared at me for several seconds without answer, so pushed on his throat again. "Okay," he cried out.

It took not five seconds for him to make the call. "Two guardians will be here to escort you shortly."

"No. I don't need them."

"But it's standard regu—"

"I don't care," I said a little louder. "I'm a guardian; I can take care of myself."

He sighed. "Fine, straight down the hall, through any doors you come across, you can't miss it."

I nodded. I already knew the way.

I continued down and when I came to what I knew was the last door before I would encounter a lot of guardians, I paused and took a breath.

I opened the quickly and as quietly as the old thing would allow. Once the door behind me was shut I stopped again, taking in the twenty or so guardians lining the halls.

I turned my head sideways and slightly down, not wanting my face to take away the fierceness of my next words. "Everyone out."

After several moments of guardians looking at me like I was stupid, I spoke again, moving my head to face the room. "Why don't I hear guardian footsteps scurrying out the door?"

Still no one moved. "Guardian Hathaway—" the guardian closest to me began.

Now I clenched my teeth. "Don't make me say it again." Then they left.

Once the last one was out the door, I strode down the hallway, head high, ready to face my lover. When I reached his cell, I turned to face it, a crossed my arms. He was sitting on the bed, back to me, the same way he had been when I saw him through Lissa's eyes. I choked up.

"Dimitri?" I was shaking, pretty bad and I was on the verge of it becoming violent shaking.

He stiffened up, and it looked like he was trying to control his shaking too. "Go away, Rose."

It was all he said, but oh, how it filled me. Hearing his voice with my own ears, seeing him with my own eyes, it lit me up. And got my shaking to become violent.

"No. I went to a lot of trouble to get down here, and I'm here now, so too bad."

"I don't want to see you Rose," he sighed out.

"Too bad," I repeated.

"I don't want to see you," he replied more forcefully. I cracked, just enough to make me walked over and slam against the bars.

"And why not? Why do you want Lissa to come down here and not me?" I was really pissed now.

He moved over and repeated my previous action, getting right in my face. If not for the fierce look in his eyes, I would have wrapped myself in his proximity. "Because I can't see you. I can't do it." He pushed away from the bars and sat back down on the bed, facing the side wall, with his knees up and head in his hands. "What I did to you… What I was _going_ to do to you… in Siberia…"

"You won't see me because you feel _guilty?_ Dimitri, I don't care, you should know that, I know what the Strigoi did wasn't anything you were in control of, that the you sitting here now is nothing like that thing."

"I care!" he yelled, and I worried the other guardians would here, then charge in and ruin this. "It wasn't just what I did to you, it's everything I did. You know I killed innocent people, you know the monster I became."

"_You_ feel guilty about those deaths?" He had a lot to learn. "You don't think for a second that _I _feel guilty too?"

He cocked his head at me. "What do you have to feel guilty for? You didn't murder the countless innocents that I did."

"No, but their all dead because of me." He gave me a curious look. "Every time that Strigoi got away from me—whether it was because of my lack of skill, or because I was taking the slightest chance that I could save you—every time I let that Strigoi live, I let it kill more innocent people. Those deaths occurred because of me.

"Not to mention all the other wrong things I did. Say, like, dropping out of school, leaving my best friend who I trained my entire life to protect and always be with, to go and kill the Strigoi. And also, breaking mine and Lissa's mortal enemy out of a high security prison, on the _tiniest_ of chances that he could help me in my quest to save you.

"I did a lot of bad things to, and you know the difference between the bad things I did and the bad things you did?" He stared at me blankly. "I was in _control_ of my actions. I knew every single move that I made would have terrible consequences on not only me, but innocent lives and the ones I love. Even the stupid things I did that I didn't know were stupid until I faced the consequences; like not checking to make sure the Strigoi you was dead because I was too distraught by the fact I had just put a silver stake through my lovers heart!" I had begun to raise my voice and took a moment to calm myself before continuing. "And I could have stopped myself from doing all of those things," I finished more quietly.

After several, heavy and quiet moments, he spoke up, "I can't see you, Roza." I don't think he intended to call me that, but it stung me and from the look on his face, him too.

"Fine." I continued, getting pissed off again. "The way I see it, you got two choices, Dimitri.

"You can sit here, and wallow in you're guilt for what I guess will be a short and miserable life.

"Or you can forgive yourself. You can come with me, and spend everyday of the rest of this long a happy second chance you just got, making up for the terrible things you did over the last four months. I know that's what I'm gonna do."

I reached out my hand, wishing for him to come towards me, to feel his touch again. He just continued to sit on the bed, and shake his head. His spoke his next words oh, so softly, "I can't, Roza." That time he meant to use my Russian name, and I only grew angrier.

I hit the bar with one hand as hard as I could. "Fine!" I yelled, looking down on him. "But you can't tell me that you don't love me, I know you love me! There was a time when you said you would always love me, and nothing would ever change that."

"I've been scarred, Rose. After what I did, I can't love anymore, my heart wont open up for it." His voice was still so quiet.

I shook my head at him, disbelieving. "I don't believe you. I love you."

He looked up at me, once last stinging glance. "Leave now, Rose."

I felt my eyes water at his words. I knew he saw it too; he cringed away from the sadness on my face. I hung my head slightly, and walked out of the room. I knew the guardians heard me coming down the hall; they were back in the room and in formation before I reached the door.

"Don't come back, Rose! I don't want to see you again."

I clutched my heart as I reached for the handle on the door. I had to get out of there before I broke down and every guardian in the room saw badass Rose Hathaway breakdown and all out cry.

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**Thanks for reading :) and btw, the only way this will be updated is when I read Spirit Bound again, IF I get anymore ideas**

**WIWR xx ;)**


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